Mom to Calvin
Social Work Intern
Length of Maternity Leave: 12-weeks
Childcare: Daycare
What did you struggle with most about returning to work after having your kids?
After returning to work I felt like I needed to catch up on the real world but was also emotional and anxious. As a first time mom it was hard adjusting to now being away from my son. It was worse when I had to pump alone in a room and I was missing him. It was very hard for me to transition into a full-time worker.
What do you find difficult about being a working parent?
Balancing all my roles and the guilt I feel about being at work and not with my son. I work with teenagers and I spend more time with them then my own son. Thats the challenge, how can I be a mom, wife and worker without neglecting one of these roles? I’m learning about balance as I go.
What do you enjoy about being a working parent?
Being a working mom is so bittersweet. At work I get to be me. I have the freedom to get lunch or step out alone without being mom for a moment. It gives me the space to do what I’m passionate about without being interrupted.
After being back at work for some time, have your views about career and family changed?
I’m not sure my views changed much but I believe that you never have to choose between family and career. There should always be limits. But I want my son to know that my career is important to me and that I am a better mom because of it. I want to invite him into what I’m passionate about doing and hope that one day he will pursue a career that he loves too.
Knowing what you know now, what’s one thing you wish you could go back in time and tell yourself as you were preparing to return to work or getting ramped up in your role?
I would tell myself “have grace with yourself. You are not choosing a career over your son. You are not just a mom, you are many roles and all of them are wonderful. Loving your job isn’t something to be guilty about.”
What did you choose for childcare, and how has it been for your family?
Daycare
Pros: my son is very social and has grown a lot from being around other kids. It gives him independence to be on his own without me over protecting him.
Cons: not having control of how his day will go.
Being a working mom has made me a better mom to my son. I’ve given him the freedom to explore and to let him be away from me.