Mom to Carter
What did you struggle with most about returning to work after having your kids?
I worked from home for my job the first 14 months of Carter's life and spent all day everyday with him. In that time we created this incredible mother-son bond that I treasured with every ounce of me, but I struggled with the thought of losing that bond upon starting my new job away from home. I thought I would be a bad mom to leave him after we created this bond and he entrusted me with so much.
What do you find difficult about being a working parent?
The balance can be difficult, but the ability to manage to stay a step ahead is truly what I find difficult. My husband works crazy hours so I am always trying to pack the bag for the sitter, pack three lunches and pack my work bag the night before to stay ahead. I also struggle to find time to do simple things like vacuum the house once a week or maintain a consistent running schedule.
What do you enjoy about being a working parent?
I love the feeling of independence! It is great know that I am doing this for myself and working hard to earn every ounce of self-pride I have, but also it enriched my soul to know I am doing this for my little guy. He gets to see that his mama can work hard for him and his future and still come home and share the night with him.
After being back at work for some time, have your views about career and family changed?
I will, no matter where I work or what I do, always put my family first. There will be times where those lines and beliefs get tested, but I always hold strong to my family values. I think it is possible for anyone to be a mom boss. I never used to think I could handle it, emotionally or mentally, but my family's support is amazing and it pushes me to do my best each and everyday.
Knowing what you know now, what’s one thing you wish you could go back in time and tell yourself as you were preparing to return to work or getting ramped up in your role?
Carter is going to love you no matter if you are home all day with him or just six hours a day with him. The immediate shock and newness of this change will not last forever. Take one day at a time and convince yourself that you are strong enough to do this.
What did you choose for childcare, and how has it been for your family?
We LOVE our sitter! We are very blessed to have a friend that is willing to watch him four days a week. Since my husband works a lot of weekends, he stays home with him on Tuesdays to bond. (Bonus, that our sitter has a little girl that Carter gets to interact with and work on social skills!) We honestly have no cons with our situation. We love that he is safe, loved and having fun each and everyday he is there with her and we know situations like these are good for him as he gets older. I love that he gets a day a week with his daddy and Carter and I get our time on the weekends together to play all day just like old times.
I telecommuted for my job for the previous three years, 14 months of that I spent watching my son grow up and generating a inseparable bond with him. I got an incredible job offer I couldn't pass up that would be away from home and I struggled thinking about abandoning my son for my career. I found the returnity project right as I was getting prepared to start that new job and read through stories from a bunch of moms just like me who faced the same uncertainties that I did. This played a major in easing into a new life change for me and from the bottom of my heart I can't thank you enough for creating this avenue for moms to help each other the way this site does!