I know that I thank you for all that you do for me every day. Over text, phone calls, as I get home from work to relieve you from a long day of watching my daughter. But the simplicity of these ‘thank yous’, while genuine, don’t feel like enough these days. And my gratitude toward the role you play and person you are has only grown since I’ve become a mom myself.
Everyone always says that it’s impossible to understand our own mothers until we become moms ourselves. And I absolutely agree. I’ve always known you were the best of the best, loved us unconditionally and raised us with every opportunity in the world. But when I became a mom myself, I finally understood the feeling of all-consuming never-ending true and pure love. And it’s crazy to think you feel about me what I feel about my own daughter. I finally understand why you do everything in the world for your children and grandchild. And I know how lucky I am to have that kind of love in my life.
Going back to work has put something else into perspective for me that’s been surprising - how difficult your job was raising us as a full-time mom. You left your career to raise your children, a job that I now realize is one of the toughest out there. As a kid, all I knew was that my mom was always around, there at the drop of a hat for me. I loved having you around for everything, but didn’t realize what a luxury it was and how much of your life you gave to us. As a kid, it never crossed my mind that you might be exhausted from chasing us around all day. That you just might want some moments alone to yourself. That the last thing you might have wanted to do was get back in the car again to drive me to dance class, or figure out dinner that night. Because you never let it show. You never had a sick day, never took a break, never had anyone relieve you for a single day. And as I’ve started asking you more questions about what it was like, you’ll now admit it was hard, you were tired, at times you lost a sense of who you were. You felt guilty ever doing anything for you because we were your job, your way of contributing to the family.
I truly don’t know how you did it. Because I'm not sure if I could. At least not as wonderfully as you. And as a child I wish I had the awareness and perspective I do now. But true to form, you always made it look elegant, easy and fun. And now, you’re doing the same for my daughter. Giving her your all while I’m at work. Helping to raise her in as joyous and adventurous of a way as you raised me. You have more zest and energy than I think i’ll ever have and are amazing at what you do. You’ve been my closest friend for as long as I’ll remember. Now, one of the greatest joys in my life is watching that same bond form between you and Sloane.
As another year is about to pass and my fortune to have you as my mother extends onward, I don’t just want to say thank you. I want to say that I see you, and I appreciate you.
Love you with all my heart.
Forever and ever,